Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Found on the web...

We had a good first week on the streets, mostly because we have good hand-picked police officers on the department. Calls were handled very efficiently and with great success, given what we inherited.

We caught a bank robber and three carjackers in the first week. To be honest, though, the bank robber was so bad at her trade that we gave her an assist on the arrest. The only thing she didn’t do was write the arrest report.

Let’s face it. When you put two bags on the counter, one white and one black, order the teller to fill the black bag, and then leave with the white one, coupled with trying to use a hairbrush as a holdup gun, wrapped in clear plastic to boot, it doesn’t really present much of a challenge.

We could barely talk the FBI into showing up on that one.

Then there were the three stooges who tried, we think twice, to carjack a woman over on Northside Drive. They got out, pulled a gun, scared the poor woman half to death, and then sat there trying to get her Lexus started. They sat and sat.

The victim ran into a drug store and came back with the manager, who got a good look at the car tag and Moe, Larry, and Curly as they drove off.

By then the cops were well on the way and located the car. The police followed them over off of Delk Road. They pulled into an apartment complex. After the car stopped, the officers rushed the car.

Moe and Larry, occupying the front seat, never got a chance to get out. Curly ran straight into a creek which, by the way, will hamper a clean getaway. A second officer fished him out as he tried to climb the hill on the other side of the creek. The only casualties were a pair of muddy boot and pants of the second officer.

Detectives think it’s the same three who tried to carjack a motorist at the Northridge Kroger the previous day.

You guessed it.

They couldn’t get the car started.



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